Ruthless, Everlasting Love
by Anonymizz334
Summary: Natara is devastated after Mal gets kidnapped. Only one kiss with him. That's all she got. This one-shot is centered around Mal's safe return. Rated T. Review!


_**Ruthless, Everlasting Love**_

_Natara's POV_

My groggy eyelids drooped as I was rudely awoken by another vicious nightmare. Images danced through my foggy mind. As per every other night since Mal had been kidnapped, every single thought that entered my mind was about him. I missed him so damn much. Yet I had to keep a hardened image. I had to be strong through this.

I just kept thinking that I would wake up one night and find him in this cold bed next to me, his arms circling me and keeping me warm. Soft kisses trailing down my collarbone and up my neck, ending at my love-deprived lips. Warmth radiating through me at an impossible rate. Love. Love from Mal. All these fictitious memories that I conjured up because the only romantic memory I truly held from him was a kiss. A kiss- and then they took him from me.

The more that I thought about how devastated that I was, the more I just wanted to cry. I couldn't cry visibly. Nobody could ever see that. I needed to be strong. I needed to be a brick. For Mal. What if he was dead? What if he was up in heaven, looking down on me… and seeing _this?_

I trudged to the bathroom, horrified by my truly ugly appearance. Saying that I stopped caring about my personal upkeep would be an understatement. Every bit of physical and mental effort lately had gone towards Mal. Between hoping he was still alive, and between trying to somehow find him- I was just drained. It showed in the dark bags underneath my eyes and the stunningly washed-out complexion on my face. Only stunning because normally, I'm very tan. That was something that Mal had always pointed out about me.

_Mal…_

My mind instantly went to him. Always. The underlying question soaked my mind as I fiddled with the right way to ask myself. _What if he's dead?_

No. Stop that, Natara. Mal wouldn't just leave you here like this, would he? Not without a fight, certainly.

I decided that I was done looking disheveled and grody. I tamed the tangle behind my neck with my fingers, feeling pain as I realized the only way to get it out would be to shower. I sighed and slid off my baggy t-shirt, revealing that yes- I'd also lost some pounds. My face even looked thinner. Noticing the roughness of my legs as I kicked off my pajama pants, I also reminded myself to shave my legs while I was in there.

The scolding water burned my skin as I entered the foggy waterfall. I didn't care, though. Before I reflexively went to turn down the temperature, I remained still and let it happen. Eventually, the burning stopped and I began to love the feel of it. Something about this pain was so pleasurable. I hadn't felt warm since that one earth-shattering, passionate kiss with my Mal, and this shower was probably the closest I'd ever get.

After shampooing, conditioning, combing out the rough tangle, and shaving my legs(and almost forgetting to), I turned off the hot stream of water and let my short, wet hair hang down over my bathrobe. Again, warmth. It was nothing compared to the warmth I felt with Mal's strong arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me towards his space heater of a body.

I took a moment to bask in it. I imagined him and I meeting again. Maybe it wouldn't happen. But I could pretend, right? He would immediately pull me into his safe, enveloping embrace. I wouldn't cry. I wouldn't even speak. I would just stay there forever. He would whisper soft, soothing words into the sensitive spot on my earlobe. And never again would I let anything like this happen to him. Nobody would ever steal him away from me. Not my stupid ex-fiancé, Oscar Santos, by me wasting over a year when I could have just been in Mal's arms all along. Not stupid Selena Mensra and her goddamn personality disorder.

It would just be me. And him. Shit, I may even propose marriage.

I sighed again, if only, if only.

Trudging back to my bed, I ended up making it and clicking on the television, but immediately switched the channel from the news to Friends. I couldn't handle the news anymore. Ever since Mal's picture has been blasted all over it, I found myself watching other things- when I could watch TV that is.

Cuddled against several pillows, I felt myself become drowsy again.

Drowsy…

Tired…

_Exhausted…_

And then a loud knock against my apartment door.

My weary eyes discovered the time on my alarm clock and I couldn't believe it. It was two-thirty in the morning. Who would be knocking at this hour?

I contemplated the possibilities as my feet ached on their way to the door. _Drunk person? Maybe they got lost? Kai got excited about his comic books and figured I'd be one to share in his excitement? Blaise checking up on me for the umpteenth time this week…_

Being so exhausted, I skipped the formalities of looking through the peephole and just threw the door open, almost knocking myself into it, I steadied myself on the handle as a face I truly hadn't expected glanced back at me.

A wet face. I had forgotten about the rain.

Aside from the water trickling off of his beautiful pores as his blue eyes stung me with unimaginable and indescribable fierceness, I couldn't believe what my eyes were perceiving. This wasn't possible.

The thin beads of water landed on the roughly jagged outlines of his now tattered jacket. Completely disheveled- his black tie clung to him, as well as his previously sky blue, sharp dress shirt. Something about the aura surrounding us suggested that I wasn't just dreaming. But it only made sense- after all, I had only been thinking about him non-stop all day everyday ever since he was kidnapped. Just as well, I was near sleep a few moments ago. Before _this _happened.

I searched for words. Before I could alter or hold back anything, a pretty simple one escaped my lips. "N- No." I stammered out, slamming the door.

This wasn't real. I knew it. I had to emerge myself in my reality. Mal wasn't in it. But after I found the real Mal, I could officially hold him in my arms. I wouldn't allow my dreams to take me like this.

As I slammed it, curiosity peaked me. I opened it again shortly after.

My legs planted themselves carefully outside the door, scanning the surroundings of the now desolate hallway from left to right. Of course.

It was a dream.

I already missed him though.

Even if it was just a dream.

I sighed and couldn't help but begin to cry. I mean- straight _bawl _out my eyes. It didn't matter. I was only dreaming.

"M-Mal Fallon, I just want to f-feel you ag-gain…" Speaking a functional sentence was hard, but again, nobody could hear me. Who cares?

My words bit me as I felt a wave of pure ecstasy shiver down my spine and shoulder blades. A familiar, deep voice echoed against the soft spot of my left earlobe, "Nat, I'm right here."

I spun around, expecting to see the same fantasy I had conjured up. Again, fighting to form a proper sentence, I remained tongue-tied and weak at the sight of him.

"You don't have to talk.. I just… I don't know what to say. You kind of slammed the door in my face."

"You aren't real." I muttered. Suddenly, I found my voice. And it stood strong.

"Oh, you… Nat- I'm very real. I guess I should have expected this. I just thought you'd be happy to see me."

Shock is hard to describe. If it were really Mal, I would have thrown myself into his arms and never let go. I would have run my fingers through his messy, dark brown hair and absorbed his scent, features, and warmth. Too bad he wasn't.

As I stifled back another round of sobs, I contained the mess of words floating through my mind. I reached my hand out gingerly, trying to confirm my suspicions that he wasn't real, and I was only dreaming again. You see- ever since he left, when I did sleep, I had nightmares that he died, and dreams that he did _this. _But usually, at this stage of the dream, I had woken up already.

My finger felt the sharp electricity radiating off of his beautiful face. As I did this, his expression was of true concern. It was like he knew I didn't believe him. Then a moment after the realization hit me- that he was in fact real- his gorgeous smile attacked me.

He was real.

I didn't hesitate. I flung my arms around him weakly and relied on him to capture me. As he did. I heard his intake as he engulfed the smell of me. The muscles on him tightened everywhere as I felt that breathtaking warmth consume my entire body. I felt safe, at home, and most of all, _loved._

My heart was escaping my chest. Speaking of escaping, I barely noticed the weight releasing from my eyes as tears poured down onto his chest. As my senses returned back to normal, I managed to capture the words he was whispering against the outline of my earlobe. The action made me shiver involuntarily. "Everything's okay now. I'm here. I'll _always _be here."

With that, my hurt turned to anger in frustration. And I couldn't tell you why. But I was furious with him. I detached myself from him and stalked back into my apartment, attempting to slam the door behind me. I knew he caught it and followed me inside, so I needed a better plan. I aimed for the bathroom.

I just needed a minute. Just a minute. But he wouldn't have it.

Tailing me like a moth to a flame, he remained right next to me as I returned to my spot in my bed. I buried myself in covers. So much for making my bed.

"Natara, _baby…"_

He had to have known my heart was melting just from those words. But I was still so _so _angry.

"You left me!" slipped from my mouth. "You left me and I thought you died!"

The eerie silence overtook the air. After gently pulling the covers away from my face, his gentle fingers grazed my cheekbone, soothing away my fears and anger- or at least trying to. "Not by choice. I didn't ask to get kidnapped." He argued.

I shot up like a bullet and I was surprised I didn't go through the roof. "You don't get it! I thought I lost _everything."_

A mix of sadness and anger infected him as well. The smile he was previously sitting with had vanished. Everything about him became more serious. From the tone of his voice to his stance. "I suffered every day that I was without you. Every day. Every hour. Every minute. I prayed and hoped I'd find you again. That I'd hold you again. That'd I'd kiss you again. Here I am, Nat. And that's all I want."

Anger dissipated completely and I found my way into his embrace again, sinking my figure against his muscular one. Perfect molded and fit for each other, I synchronized my breathing with his and finally relaxed. My tears were beginning to dry up, not fully. Some still leaked out, but I was at least able to kiss him. And I did.

Our lips were practically glued to one another as the both of us fought for dominance. Somehow, the kiss trumped the first one we shared. His razor stubble poked my chin and I couldn't help but love the burn of the tickle that it made. It actually kind of turned me on.

I only separated our lips to say one thing. "Please, don't leave me!" I started begging like a child. I intertwined my fingers with the fingers of the opposite hand as I shot him my puppy dog eyes. More tears flushed out of my raw eyes as I felt like my life was over.

A sudden wave of sadness appeared of nowhere. "I'm never going to. I'd fall apart." He whispered again into my ear as I felt a very abrupt wave of exhaustion pass over me. And I think I knew why. Not only was I cradled in Mal's comfortable hold like a child, with him grazing my sides gently, erupting a fire inside of me, I couldn't help but just want to fall asleep there. I fought to keep my eyes open. I couldn't waste this time. Who knew how long he'd really be here for?

Somehow, he read my mind. "You're exhausted and I can tell. Sleep. You look horrible."

I shuddered away in rejection, rolling towards the other side of the spacious bed. "Thanks. It's nice to see you, too."

His sigh was sharp as his arms snaked around me again, this time, his words suffocating my right ear and melting it. "Baby, you're gorgeous and you know that. You know what I meant."

I remained silent.

"… Right?"

"I don't want to sleep. I don't want you to leave."

"I'm not leaving. I'm staying right here. The only place I need to go is the shower… otherwise, I'm not going to leave your side."

Comfort overtook me as I felt officially calmed down from my emotional rampage. Praise Mal for being the trooper that he is, sometimes. "So what happened?" I inquired as he brushed strands of loose hair from my face.

Our eyes were locked together as he began the story. "Well, first I was in a cell… somewhere. As soon as I find that part out, I'll tell you. But anyways, then the next thing I know, I'm in South America…. "

I kept my mind focused on remaining awake. _Come on, Natara. Your Mal is finally back now. Spend time with him. You missed him. Just stay awake._

But I was too drained. Sleep captured me and the warmth never disappeared.

_**Mal's POV**_

"Well, first I was in a cell… somewhere. As soon as I find that part out, I'll tell you. But anyways, then the next thing I know, I'm in South America. San Trobida? Something like that? Anyways, it was the cartels, and-"

I was interrupted by a soft, but very audible sigh. Her gentle breaths tickled my chest through my soaking shirt(between the rain and my love's tears).

She was sleeping. It was probably a good thing, actually. I knew she was beyond exhausted.

The truth? I loved Natara. With my whole heart. And as badly as I'd hoped those words would escape my lips tonight for the first time, they hadn't. Yeah, it was early. And we weren't even officially together yet. But I knew she felt the same way about me. Believe me when I remind you; I am through with these hesitations.

I leaned up against her earlobe one last time, prepared to tell her the truth. After all, she was sleeping. She wouldn't remember this.

As I did, her angelic voice mumbled something I hadn't expected. "Oh Mal, I love you so much… "

The grip of her light arm around my back had tightened. I knew she meant it. And took much pride in that. _She_ loved _me. _Natara Williams, the unattainable federal bureau's hot-shot profiler, she loved _me. _

And nobody was going to get in my way of that. As long as those three words were escaping her perfect, peach lips… and as long as my heart rate flew off the charts just from being in her presence, and as long as she's have me…

Nobody could do a thing.


End file.
